What's Next?

I could show you a progress pic of my cross stitch sampler, but I have something else on my mind today -- well for the past few weeks really.

I'm wondering what's next for me. I'm at a point in my life where many paths lay before me and I feel like I just need to chose one, but I'm frozen with indecision. It's a strange feeling -- almost like there are too many choices, so I chose none. . . but time is running out and I need to make a decision because staying here at the crossroads is not an option for much longer.

Why now? Well, the past 6 months were very stressful -- we were in a holding pattern waiting to see what would happen with Pete's job and then when he knew that they were closing up shop there was the whole job hunting thing which is never fun. As it turned out, all the worrying was for nothing because he got another job right away and was only out of work for a few weeks. Now we are on a new schedule -- he's working longer hours and beginning a new phase of his career.

And I'm still here at home.

Now I'm not sitting around doing nothing. I'm still homeschooling Maddie and I have my two businesses. But Maddie is getting older and doesn't need as much help with things as she once did. And I'm losing interest in my businesses. Stamping online is almost 6 years old now and while it is going along well, It's certainly not all that exciting anymore. In fact, it runs quite smoothly and requires less and less of my time as I make refinements to my process. And it's obvious that I've lost my knitting mojo. I haven't had a new pattern out for Black Sheep Bags since last year.

So where do I go? Do I start a third business? Something new and interesting? Do I try to refocus on one of the existing businesses? Maybe I do something entirely different. I just don't know.

One thing I do know is that I need to make a decision. I feel like if I could just visualize what I want, I could make it happen. But what do I want? That is the real question.

Comments

[Adina]

I think that feeling is going around. Nothing like trying to figure out what you want to be when you grow up huh?

[Michelle]

When you figure it out, will you let me know? I need some direction, too. You could try to get a book deal. Seems like that's a popular activity for bloggers these days.

[--Deb]

I'm sure you'll figure it out!

[jessie]

You are not alone! The deal with life is that things are changing all the time and we're constantly moving through different phases. It would be nice if a whole family could move seamlessly from one to the next, both individually and as a group, but that would be pretty complicated to engineer.

Maybe you could try to look at this crossroads as an opportunity to be free to do whatever you want. (I know, the paralysis; happened to me after college, so I waited tables. But it's how I met my husband, and the Rest Is History.)

What you need is a passion. A new one. Do you have any time to explore anything besides stamping and knitting? Take classes? Volunteer? Organize something to do with homeschooling?

Your next adventure is waiting for you, you just don't know what it is yet. Instead of feeling like you have to create the next big thing, open up your mind and let it find you.

Ooh, how zen. But do you know what I mean?

[Tracey]

OH my goodness have I been through this...several times. OK, just remember: Deciding to do nothing, is still a decision. It sounds like you need a respite to clear your head and re-prioritize. Take some time to spend on yourself and think about where you want to be, how are you going to get there, see what is speaking to you.

We are all here behind you...waiting for the next big thing!

[scout]

Go buy a new camera and play on Flickr. It's fun! lol

I wish you lots of luck in whatever you decide to do. I think it needs to involve chocolate and reading. Since you love doing that!

[Sonja]

Best of luck! I read your post thinking been there/still there!

I think it's good to be in that point of unclarity... eventually things will become clearer (at least I hope so!)

[claudia]

I hope you find It. Or something close enough.

[Ellen]

Take some classes--fiber classes, a history class, whatever. You'll find something new and interesting, and it'll get you out of the house and with adults in a new setting. We all need a little time away from the family to refocus.